February 26, 2019 at 11:18AM
It is not unusual for school districts to make headlines because of the actions of a small group of people. Tremper High School is the latest school to make the headlines and nightly news due to inappropriate awards given out at the cheerleading awards banquet in March 2018.
The shame that surrounds being called out because of a body type can do damage that lasts a lifetime. Everyone laughs, even the person who is being called out, but inside they may be ashamed, humiliated and embarrassed. Whenever someone is called names and shamed because of their body, it can cause long-term emotional pain.
Most of us do not have runway worthy bodies. The old adage, "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never harm me" is false. The truth is "Sticks and stone may break my bones, and words will break my heart." Once broken, it is so hard to put back together again.
This incident is not exclusive to Tremper High School or Kenosha. It can happen in any community, any school and any home. These are learned behaviors that are embedded in our culture. When something like this happens, everyone should take notice and educate staff, students, employees and family members about the damage of body shaming, name-calling, stereotyping and labeling.
Rather than placing judgement and shame on the school or community, we should all be part of the solution.
We can all look honestly at our own attitudes and behavior. What can I do to build up our youth? Schools? Communities? Do I participate in name-calling, body shaming, stereotyping or labeling people in my family, co-workers or in my community? One way we can all help to change the culture is to practice empathy.
When we look at a situation through another person's perspective, how they see and feel about something, we have a better understanding of how our actions can hurt or help someone. By reflecting on our own experience and how we would feel, we may be better able to connect with others.
How would I feel if I was a parent of the cheerleader receiving the award? How do you think the parents felt? Have I ever been shamed or made fun of because of my body? How did that make me feel? How might the young woman receiving the award feel?
Think of someone you know that has been called names, labeled or put into a box because of stereotyping? How do you think they feel? When we think of how negative actions affect other people, we can then decide on what we can do to be a part of the solution.
We can stand for up for others, support them, listen to their story, be their friend and practice inclusion. Many schools have been in the media for inappropriate actions. Any school can be the next big news story. The schools and coaches should not be shamed. This is the time to teach and be examples for the change we want to see.
As a former coach of a high school pom squad, I would guess that awards were also given out for cheerleading ability and leadership. Expand on that. Encourage their best. Now is not the time to take away awards. Set boundaries. Teach. That is our job.
Sue Hollow, of Racine, is co-founder of Peace Learning Circles and a former high school pom squad coach. She worked with schools in Racine, Kenosha and Walworth counties with Peace Learning Circles.
It is not unusual for school districts to make headlines because of the actions of a small group of people. Tremper High School is the latest school to make the headlines and nightly news due to inappropriate awards given out at the cheerleading awards banquet in March 2018.
The shame that surrounds being called out because of a body type can do damage that lasts a lifetime. Everyone laughs, even the person who is being called out, but inside they may be ashamed, humiliated and embarrassed. Whenever someone is called names and shamed because of their body, it can cause long-term emotional pain.
Most of us do not have runway worthy bodies. The old adage, "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never harm me" is false. The truth is "Sticks and stone may break my bones, and words will break my heart." Once broken, it is so hard to put back together again.
This incident is not exclusive to Tremper High School or Kenosha. It can happen in any community, any school and any home. These are learned behaviors that are embedded in our culture. When something like this happens, everyone should take notice and educate staff, students, employees and family members about the damage of body shaming, name-calling, stereotyping and labeling.
Rather than placing judgement and shame on the school or community, we should all be part of the solution.
We can all look honestly at our own attitudes and behavior. What can I do to build up our youth? Schools? Communities? Do I participate in name-calling, body shaming, stereotyping or labeling people in my family, co-workers or in my community? One way we can all help to change the culture is to practice empathy.
When we look at a situation through another person's perspective, how they see and feel about something, we have a better understanding of how our actions can hurt or help someone. By reflecting on our own experience and how we would feel, we may be better able to connect with others.
How would I feel if I was a parent of the cheerleader receiving the award? How do you think the parents felt? Have I ever been shamed or made fun of because of my body? How did that make me feel? How might the young woman receiving the award feel?
Think of someone you know that has been called names, labeled or put into a box because of stereotyping? How do you think they feel? When we think of how negative actions affect other people, we can then decide on what we can do to be a part of the solution.
We can stand for up for others, support them, listen to their story, be their friend and practice inclusion. Many schools have been in the media for inappropriate actions. Any school can be the next big news story. The schools and coaches should not be shamed. This is the time to teach and be examples for the change we want to see.
As a former coach of a high school pom squad, I would guess that awards were also given out for cheerleading ability and leadership. Expand on that. Encourage their best. Now is not the time to take away awards. Set boundaries. Teach. That is our job.
Sue Hollow, of Racine, is co-founder of Peace Learning Circles and a former high school pom squad coach. She worked with schools in Racine, Kenosha and Walworth counties with Peace Learning Circles.
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